Micah 6: 8

8 No, O people, the Lord has already told you what is good, and this is what he requires: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.

-New Living Translation



8 No, O people, the Lord has already told you what is good, and this is what he requires: to go to church at least once a week (twice if you want to be holy and three times if you want to be righteous), to give at least 10% of your money to the same church (give more if you want to be rich), never hang out with sinners (unless they are family members and then you must pester them nonstop about attending church with you),to love how awesome you are now that you are a Christian, and to pretend to be humble while looking down on non-Christians because being a Christian makes you better than them.

- Modern Church Translation

Proverbs 3: 5 and 6

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
6 Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths.
- New Living Translation

5 Trust in what your pastor tells you about the Lord with all your heart; for you are only a layperson incapable of understanding the Lord, the Bible, or any spiritual matter. Your only hope of understanding comes from relying on the wisdom of a licensed minister ordained by having full knowledge of the inerrant teachings of your denomination.
6 Let your paths be guided and dictated by the leadership of your church in all you do so that you never have to worry about finding God’s will for yourself.
- Modern Church Translation

Amos 5: 21 through 24

21 “I hate all your show and pretense – the hypocrisy of your religious festivals and solemn assemblies.
22 I will not accept your burnt offerings and grain offerings. I won’t even notice all your choice peace offerings.
23 Away with your hymns of praise! They are only noise to my ears. I will not listen to your music, no matter how lovely it is.
24 Instead, I want to see a mighty flood of justice, a river of righteous living that will never run dry.”
- New Living Translation

21 “I am powerless to resist all your show and pretense. They are so beautiful that I barely notice the hypocrisy between the way you really live your life and the show you put on for me at your church functions and services.
22 I will accept absolutely anything you want to give, but it should be no less than 10% of your gross income (not net, don’t try and cheat me). And it only counts if you give it to your church. You must do this because there is nothing more important to me than a big building with lots of staff designed to entertain my followers every Sunday morning, and it takes lots of money to entertain you people.
23 I love your forced and legalistic ritual worship every Sunday morning. How did you know I require at least 30 minutes of worship, but no more than 45 minutes once per week? I especially enjoy it when you sing the same chorus over and over and over ad nauseum.
24 I desire only to see a mighty flood of church sponsored events designed for your entertainment and a river of money to support them that will never run dry.”
- Modern Church Translation